I start my new job this coming Monday.

Don’t get carried away with excitement, I am going to be an assistant to the Real Estate Agents at this real estate company. Yes, not exactly what I went to college for, and certainly not what my degree is in, but beggars can’t be choosers, and i need a “real job” because nannying just aint cuttin’ it. I will let you know how it goes.

Prior to starting on Monday, I have this entire week off. Which is nice in once sense, (but utterly boring in another when everyone you like is working) but has really caused me to focus on the fact that I cannot function without the internet. Truly, people, I am addicted. Like a fat kid needs cake, I need the damn internet. I find the most bizarre things to do:

Spy on people from high school’s myspace page.

Read articles on CNN.com about random stuff like a girl who did her thesis on strip clubs.

Watch videos on CNN.com about an Orangutan who escaped from a zoo, or the paternity fight over some chick who slept with identical brothers and now she doesn’t know who da BabyDaddy izzz cuz tha DNA izz da same.

Read blogs by people i dont know.

Visit Flickr and look at pictures from people i dont know.

Visit the local classifieds to see if anyone is getting rid of a fridge or something i “need”.

Go to amazon.com to browse more shit i think i “need”.

I can email people for hooooours.

I can also chat on yahoo messenger from anywhere in the range of 2 – 5 hours.

I download new Lost episodes (because we are waaaay behind in Oz) and then watch them.

Quick Sidenote: what the hell has happened to Lost anyway? watching the last episode, and the season finale last night, i couldn’t help but want to call JJ Abrams and ask him what the F happened to this brilliant show? Doing the backstory on Ben, (who is one of the Others, btw) was a waste of time to me, because HELLO, he is not a reeeeal member of the show (i.e, he is not Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Charlie, Claire, etc.) so who gives a rat’s ass why he is on the damn island?

Anyway, the bottom line here is that I love my computer. More specifically, i love my Mac. Other computers just dont compare to the perfection of my Powerbook G4.

As I began to dwell on the fact that i would DIE without having wireless-super-fast-internet, i pondered all the other things I dont think I could live without.

#1. text messaging: why did we not use this feature of our phones until now? i remember seeing “SMS” in the menu of my first Nokia (that was the size of a very fat harmonica btw) but never dawned on me to use it. Text messaging is brilliant because you can chat during things you should be paying attention to (meetings, school, lectures, church, etc.) and not really get in trouble….you can “talk” to people when its convenient for YOU (which is always awesome, being the self-centered girl that i am) …..and you can communicate almost instantly with people in other countries (helpful when you live overseas, like me).

#2. email: when i try to think back to the mid-late 90s, when I joined the Internet Cult, emailing was just coming about as a main form of communication. now, i have no idea what i would do without it. can you imagine having to caaaaallll people to confirm the meeting is still on at 4pm? or having to fill people in on the details of your child’s birth in person? god forbid! just send a “mass email” with pictures attached, and then everyone will know your kid looks more like the milkman, than the daddy.

#3. google: praise those 2 nerds who came up with it. you can google anything. don’t know the name of the song, but just a few lyrics? easy! type ‘em in, and you will magically find out the artist, name, record label, and when the THS is airing on E!…. need some shoes re-soled? no problem! type in “shoe repair in melbourne” and you are given a map with different locations flagged and everything. without the handy google search bar in my window….i might just have to open the yellow pages! (shock!horror!gasp!)
I am sure there are more things I cannot live without, but this is my shorthand list for right now. Trying to remember what life was like before I discovered the internet, all i can come up with is this: I think I played outside more.

Is that a bad thing?